Thursday, July 16, 2009


"You know, why plan my future when it's just gonna be a wall of paint crashing down on me?"
--Malcolm from Malcolm in The Middle

In the past couple of days, I went through career doubt. But who knew that a peaceful revelation would come from my likes of watching Malcolm in The Middle! I was sitting in my room last week, thinking about the school year that lies ahead of me. It's Junior year baby--my 2nd to last year before it's time for me to head out into the "real world." I instantly began to panic! I realized that I would need to kick it into high gear and get my profession priorities straight. Ugh, I worry too much. But anyway, I thought about where I'd eventually want work, or what I think may be my dream job. I then pondered some more and realized that to outsiders, I have it all (career wise).

This is when frustration sets in.

You see, someone once called me the poster child for how to set up a career. And a professor actually told me that I should aid and speak to fellow students. Flattering, but pressure much? All I know is that I know what I love and that I'm following the path of my love--seeing where it leads me. So while I got frustrated with the fact that people are already expecting me to succeed (which I confidently know I will), I thought about the "what ifs." After seeing so many of my recent grad friends, who happen to be the same major as me, struggle to find jobs (thanks to the economy & scared-to-hire employers), III got scared. I'm scared that all my experiences will not be enough. I'm scared that my chosen path may be setting me up for failure. I'm just. Plain. Scared. But that's normal, right? To be scared? I think so.

Needless to say, after watching Malcolm in The Middle, I concocted this thought: I am without a doubt passionate about all the things I am doing. I guess I just want to see my future, but I can't. I like to plan things, but I can't... in this case. All I know is, I like to write, edit, blog, eat cupcakes, follow fashion and so much more. Where am I heading? Only time will tell; only time will tell.

Any other scared college kids out there?

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