The Story of A Girl Who's Almost 21

YES! I'm almost a "legal adult!" In 26 days (1.23.10) yours truly will be turning the not-so-ripe-old age of 21. I'm going to be taking a week off from blogging until the new year. And in the days leading up until my B-Day, I'll be sharing my favorite part of pop culture from the past 21 years of my life--including music videos, trends and etc.

I'll leave you with this music video from Nine Days. The song's called Absolutely (Story of A Girl). Love it. It brings me back to 5th grade. I wish someone would write a song about me!

xoxo

Dad Sends Me Food For Thought

Sometimes my dad sends me funny things and sometimes he sends me weird things, via e-mail. This time, big poppa sent me an e-mail with a link to a video that I think is worth sharing.

It's a video of a novelist who speaks about the power of a single story and how being told that specific story can shape our views on life and different cultures. Of course the plus side is she is also a Naija (Nigerian) like myself. I believe in diversity, as proved by this somewhat controversial article I wrote this semester about the judge who denied an interracial couple a marriage license--jerk--and I think what she speaks about somewhat feeds my article's case for diversity and less cultural ignorance.

xoxo

Self Control -- Try It!

An acrostic poem a friend recently made for me.
The first "A" pushed me to want more self control in my life.
I've recently discovered this amazing thing called self control. Have you heard of it?

Growing up, I never had it because by nature I have an obsessive personality. When I love or do something, I do it to the max because I believe in nothing but success. I'd like to call this passion. I'm a passionate person and find everything about life exciting! Well anyway, I recently conjured up the idea that I need a little self control in my life.

The past month or so has been hell on Earth for me. I'm an overly involved college student who's a somewhat perfectionist. I stay up until the wee hours of the morning doing school work and other tasks, only to get a couple hours of shut eye. I then have to force myself to be bright eyed and bushy tailed for my 9am class, job, internship and well, day. My unruly late nights then leave me engulfing fatty snacks, forgetting to hit the gym, catching a SINUS INFECTION and working myself to exhaustion. Despite all this unpleasant craziness, I love my life. I love being a busy body. But I think the time has come for me to say, enough is enough.

I'm going to be exploring self control by being more strict on my bedtime schedule, restricting the amount of work I put on my plate, not blowing my hard earned cash on delectable shoesies from ALDO and just leading a healthier lifestyle.

The first step into self control I took was not buying these bad boys I told you all about. ALDO is having a sale and I decided to get more for my buck. I bought two much-needed flats for the price of one! Being that I am going to see The Script in a little over a week with one of my good friends, I think a flat will go with whatever outfit I decide to wear. Now, this doesn't mean I won't get them. I'm just going to wait until I have the money.

Needless to say, I think we could all use a little self control in our lives...

xoxo

Ask Secretista: What is your favorite childhood memory?

As you know, I've decided to follow in the footsteps of other Bloggers and do a question and answer series.

What is your favorite childhood memory?

Hmm. My favorite childhood memory is the first day of school. I love the days leading up to it and I love going Back-to-School shopping! I pretty much remember what I wore on the first day of school for every single school year since I was 8 years old. My favorite outfit was in 3rd grade when I wore a leopard print skort, a tan T-shirt with a leopard print heart in the middle of it, and my pearly white Mary Janes. Wow. Even thinking about it now makes me want to recreate it. And with a new semester right around the corner, I can't help but think, "What will I wear on my first day of classes?"

xoxo

Lost Scent of Identity

Pink Sugar; Bloom by Reese Witherspoon; Fancy by Jessica Simpson

As long as I can remember, I've been obsessed with having a signature scent. When I was in Elementary School, it was whatever Juice Bar (remember those?!) kiddie perfume that was sweet smelling at the time. In my mallrat years aka Middle School, I raided Bath & Body Works. I especially loved the Moonlight Path and Warm Vanilla Sugar fragrances. And in High School, I fell head-over-heels for Pink Sugar from Aquolina. I did test the scented waters with every one of Britney Spears' perfumes, as well as, Hilary Duff's With Love (which I still love), but remained faithful to Pink Sugar. The sugary perfume just smells so darn yummy! When I walk into a room, people know that I have arrived because that's MY smell. I love being told I smell like cotton candy. It makes me feel sweet! Nevertheless, I concurred that any sugary and vanilla-y scent smelled dandy on me.

But in recent months, my pops bought me a new perfume. And ever since that first spritz of Fancy by Jessica Simpson, I've been having a Lost Scent of Identity. I'm not a teenager anymore, so I wonder if Pink Sugar is still an appropriate scent for me? Should I spray myself with something that's more mature? Or should I hold on to my youth with a smell so vibrant and sweet-rendering like Pink Sugar? I just don't know. Throw Bloom by Reese Witherspoon into the mix (a gift a-la my internship) and now I'm really confused. Bloom smells like flowers. I'm not a big fan of flowers (I have allergies), but I'm open to new fragrances. So as I sit here staring at the three scent selections on my dresser, I can't help but wonder, does our scent define who we are?

What's your scent?

xoxo

Chocolate Sorrows!

Sorry I've been missing in action for the past couple of days. My life outside web land has been a little crazy. From trying to find a part-time job, to making sure my school fees are paid for, I've had my hands full. Needless to say, I'll be revealing the winner of the fabulous BB Dakota dress on Monday. Keep your eyes peeled lovelies! Also, I may have turned a new leaf, or well, an old one. Before cupcakes, I was all about brownies! I discovered these creations by Fairytale Brownies on Wednesday. A company that owns brownies.com is more than A-Okay in my book. I can't wait to try one of their fudge-filled confections!

Photo: Fairytale Brownies

xoxo

Can You Dig It?

Last night I came home to find my parents in the kitchen cooking and looking over old albums. How cute. I will admit though that after a long day, the last thing I wanted to do was sit with my parents and look at photos of people I didn't know. Well, it turned out to not be a total sham. I'm a sucker for the oldies but goodies. I felt the need to share this one. It's my dad circa 1973.

Can you dig it?

Pop's a Jive Turkey

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Secretista

So Long Sophomore Year!

Two years completed; two years still ahead. As I sit in my room staring at the walls that were once covered in posters, paintings and inspirational words, I can't help but release a bittersweet sigh and reflect on this past school year.

A messy collage of my sophomore year.

This school year--although the Sophomore slump it was--has taught me a lot about myself and others. It caused me to realize that I am attending the right school and that I am picking the right career path. I've met so many amazingly new people and done so many amazingly new things that it boggles my mind. So join me as I reminisce and say so long to my sophomore year.

*I kick started sophomore year with Resident Assistant staff training. Here, I fell in love with the job position and my staff. Becoming a Resident Assistant has so far been one of the highlights of my college career. This job has allowed me to grow as a person in so many ways, and I don't know if I could ever let it go.

*Next, I had two amazing internships:

My internship at Seventeen magazine couldn't have been better. It solidified my dream for working in the fashion and magazine industry. I screeched with joy every time I saw my name in the magazine under interns, attended a couple of fashion week shows and shamelessly showed off the photo shoot I helped style. But most importantly, I met the most amazing people ever: my fellow interns and the editors.

My internship at House Beautiful magazine convinced me that I was made for the web (duh!). Sure I didn't know much about home décor going in, but now I can say I know a little somethin' somethin' about upholstery and reclaimed furniture; only a little. I also learned vital information about managing a magazine's Web site and wrote a couple of things for the site. Not to mention, my editor was the bombdigity. Yes. I said bombdigity.

*After attending Teen Vogue Fashion U with the cute La Petite Fashionista, I knew I had to chase after my dreams of working in the fashion industry with a little more oomph!

*My unhealthy obsession with cupcakes bloomed into something unexplainable.

*I turned 20 and had a mini-breakdown. What do you mean I'm not a teen anymore?

*I came to terms with my personal style: modernly conservative with an edge.

*I decided to try and devote most of my wardrobe to one color: red.

*Pinkrockcandy and I started a fashion club at our school (finally!).

*Last and most importantly, I realized the importance of making time for friends.

Oh sophomore year, where have you gone? Soon I'll be a senior looking for a "real world" job. YIKES!

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Secretista

The Broke Joke

I'm borderline broke and well, that's no joke.

Money or the lack thereof has been racking my brain for quite some time now. However, I've accepted that this is the territory that comes with being a super-busy, interning-crazy, fashion addict college student. When I look at my bank account, I can't help but wonder if the almost $500 I spent at Zara five months ago is what caused my current state of impoverish. Or could it have been the $200 plus I spent at Aldo? And although these expensive purchases may have contributed to my diminishing bank account, I think the blame is on life. Yes. I said LIFE. I keep track of what I spend my money on and between interning in New York City and living on my own, life is pretty darn expensive. I guess it's all a part of growing up? I know I'll be fine. And let's just say that for the future I will be making more careful financial decisions. It probably doesn't help that I just bought a $60 Calvin Klein dress from Marshalls for an upcoming school formal...

May be this green dress will bring me more... green!

---
Secretista

This Should Be Interesting

I almost never do tags. It's only because I'm not sure if you lovely readers are interested in my life. But I guess you must be if you're reading my blog--haha! I sometimes wonder if I really am that interesting? I hope so. Well, I've been tagged by the ever-so-cute Little Bow Prep, and I actually think this tag will be interesting.

My heart in one picture:

Richard Avedon.
Quite possibly the greatest fashion photographer to ever live.

My heart in one poem:

The Red Wheelbarrow
William Carlos Williams

so much depends
upon

a red wheel
barrow

glazed with rain
water

beside the white
chickens.

While others claim that this poem has a deeper meaning, I refuse to believe that. This poem is simply sweet.

My heart in one item of clothing:

I LOVE my over-the-knee boots from ALDO.

My heart in one song:

Jesse McCartney -- Runnin'

My heart in one place:

New York City (DUH!)

My heart in one Disney Princess:

Cinderella

My heart in one quote:

"I’m selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I’m out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best." Marilyn Monroe

You're all tagged.

---
Secretista

Study Break

Oh the oxymoron in that headline. I haven't been posting because it's midterm week, which means a lot of studying (sort of). I'll be back in two days. I just need to get past Thursday and my week and life is back to normal.

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Secretista

Giambattista Valli At Bergdorf Goodman

Allergies suck. My nose is extremely stuffy, my eyes are watery and I can't stop sneezing. I hope I make it through this week. I went home early from my internship earlier this week. I went into work because I was DETERMINED to still work even though I felt like (for the lack of a better word) shit.

Anyway, I was getting my daily dose of world and fashion news yesterday when I saw a lovely little advertisement on NY Mag's fashion blog: The Cut. It's like the Web site knew I am obsessed with Giambattista Valli's creations. Now, if only I could afford to shop at Bergdorf Goodman...

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Secretista

Smile!

By nature I am a person that smiles and giggles, A LOT. All my friends will tell you that for the most part I can't finish a sentence without laughing or giggling. But the one thing that makes me smile is having lunch with friends while we laugh obnoxiously and have great conversations; and today's lunch with some fellow RA staff members brightened my gloomy snowy day.

Walking precautiously through the snow after our lunch.

What makes you smile?

---
Secretista

I'm 20?

As I woke up this morning for my 2nd day of RA training, I expected new things like Molly Ringwald's character in Sixteen Candles. Bigger boobs? Mmm nope, still small. Slimmer body? Nope, still bootylicious. Don't get me wrong, I love my body, but I just expected to wake up, look in the mirror, and "feel" older. I don't. It feels really, really weird. I'm not a "teen" anymore. *shakes head* I'm not a "teen" anymore. Well anyway, my day was full of fun and surprises--like the flower cupcake a good friend from back home had delivered to me on campus! My friends know me too well.

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Secretista

Parents Do Understand

Yesterday while doing my homework, or eh, trying to do my homework, my cell phone rang. It was my dad! And through our conversation, a portion of my worst nightmares came into place. This may sound strange, but the Internet is my safe haven away from my family, so when I found out my dad decided to Google my name, I was scared my blog would come up **Gulp**. Well, here's how the conversation went down.

Dad: Hiiiiii honey!!
Secretista: Hi dad!
Dad: What are you doing? Homework?
Secretista: Yeah...
Dad: So listen, your uncle called and said he saw you on the Internet... YouTube?
Secretista: ?!?! Oh yeah, my resident had to interview me for a journalism project of hers.
Dad: Oh yeah, yeah. So I decided to go on Google and type in your name...
Secretista: **Widens eyes**
Dad: ...and see what else came up. I see your school articles come up.
Secretista: Yeah, we put our school paper on the Internet.
Dad: And what is this JAYE?
Secretista: Just this online magazine I sort of work for. I'm getting clips through it!
Dad: Yeahhh I seee. That's good, getting yourself out there. That's ma girl! I'm going to print your articles, okay?

And then our conversation some how changed to pancakes? But ultimately, I could tell he was proud of me and behind my decision to enter the world of journalism. Sure my dad would rather have me become a doctor and have a "secure" career, but he just wants me to be happy. I guess parents do understand.

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Secretista

P.S. Be sure to check out the December 2008 issue of JAYE Magazine! I'm the Accessories Editor now, with a special page **grins**. Click the image below or any of the JAYE links above to read the latest issue.

Seventeen Forever

I sometimes wish I were 17 again--living it up in high school and enjoying the luxury of being taken care of by my parents. But that's done and I'm 19 (not for long). It amazes me how in the span of two years I have matured so much. Two years ago, if you had told me that I would be paying my own way through school, cooking my own food, and pretty much living on my own, I would have laughed in your face. I'll admit it. I've always been independent, but ultimately, I was daddy's little girl. With a smile and a bat of my eyelashes, I could have what I want (my dad can try and deny it, but I had him under my spell!).

And as I look at the December/January issue of Seventeen (WITH MY NAME IN IT UNDER INTERNS), I can't help but wish to go back two years ago and be 17 forever.

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Secretista

Monday Obsession: Daydreaming

I've been daydreaming and thinking of you. Well, not really. I've been daydreaming and thinking about a lot of things. My daydreaming is really caused by my lack of sleep (oh how I love college--heh), which leaves me slightly zombie like but I'll get over it. Anyway, Halloween is sort of around the corner--if you consider two and a half weeks around the corner--and my costume idea is what's been prominent in my mind. This year I decided to take my costume idea from a running inside joke on the RA staff. I won't tell you what it is, but I will say that it includes a FULL LENGTH black leotard from Danskin, a black poofy skirt, a studded belt, a choker, and a honey blond chopped wig. Okay, one hint: "Disturbia!" Moreover, I think leotards are the must have when it comes to costumes. They serve as the basis for pretty much any creative costume idea. Trust me. Pick up a leotard in any color and the idea will just come to you!

You know, there is just something so intriguing about a leotard; period. But I can't figure it out. What do you think is so intriguing about a leotard?

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Secretista

Update: My Life & This Blog

Lately I've been feeling selfish. My devoted readers come back day-in and day-out and are hit with no update. This comes as a reflection from a lunch conversation I had on Friday. The topic was people who get so consumed in their school life that they don't make time for fun; and I hate to admit it, but I am slightly one of those people. I get so caught up in my life (or stuck on the college freight train as I call it) that I forget to have a good time and neglect my friends. This seems to be a reoccurring problem in my life. How can I solve this? Hmm...

Anyway, the news that CosmoGIRL! is folding is unbelievably shocking! Founded by my idol Atoosa Rubenstein, I can't believe such a wonderful teen magazine (besides Seventeen) is folding. This sends chills up and down my spine because as my college days prolong and my future career goals come into eye sight, I am scared. I am very very scared. Teen publication is what I see in my near future and with one less teen magazine out there, it means there will be more competition for me! It looks like I'm going to have to put on my gloves and start banging out internships like there is no tomorrow. But for now, I'll focus on my one--my one internship that I adore. My one internship where the ladies and man are fabulous, sweet, and fashionable. It's nothing but smiles, laughter, and of course work throughout the office. I'm in heaven.

Please note that I will no longer be doing outfit pictures. It might be because I don't make time to take the pictures and forget about it after I've already changed into my PJs OR, I just don't feel like it--I think it might be both. I've turned a new leaf. I'm over taking pictures of my outfits. Yes, I said I'm over it. No I haven't found my style, but I do think that it will eventually come to me, so for now I'm going to experiment on my own and not have documentation of my faux pas. Although, looking back and laughing at them would be fun. Most importantly, I WILL try to have occasional jumping pictures--their so much fun!

Lastly, I was graced with the opportunity to see Jason Mraz yesterday for FREE at my school. All I can say is: I am in love. The next guy who wants to date me must be able to sing like him. PERIOD.

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Secretista

NO MORE CUPCAKES!

There are times in our lives where we wish certain things would just never happen. Things like breaking a heel and not having a spare pair of shoes, failing a test even though you spent all night studying, or (to the extreme) losing a loved one too early in life. Well, today the most unthinkable thing happened. Today is one of my resident's birthday (I'm an RA) and after my internship, I decided to stop by Crumbs Bakeshop to pick up a chocolate cupcake with chocolate icing (she loves chocolate) for her. But to my horror, Crumbs Bakeshop was OUT OF CUPCAKES! NO. I'M NOT KIDDING!

Here's what happened: With two hours to closing, I arrived at Crumbs Bakeshop around 6pm. I was excited that I would get to have one of their delicious and well-priced cupcakes. But when I skipped up to the door, an 8x11 paper sign smacked me in the face. It read, "Sorry no more cupcakes today!" My mind went blank and my jaw dropped. I thought, "What?!" I walked in and asked the person up front, "Are you serious? Is there really no more cupcakes?!" She said, "Yeah, sorry." I glared over at the cupcake display fridge and she was right. THERE WERE NO MORE CUPCAKES! I wasn't the only one in disbelief. Everyone that walked in after me had THE SAME EXACT reaction--jaw dropped and everything. So since I didn't want to miss my train back, I decided to forget about the cupcakes and go back another time.

I'm still in shock. Anything unbelievable happen to you recently?

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Secretista

Intern and The City: The End (Summer 08)

Well. It's over. At 4:30 sharp I deleted all the files on my computer, cleared my desk area, handed in my access card and finished some last minute paperwork. I honestly don't think I could have had a BETTER first internship. It was like God heard me and knew that where I interned would be the perfect place for me to learn what I need to know and much more.

The day started off with me handing out thank you cards and gifts. Wondering what the gifts were? Just one word: elephant. Being that the elephant IS my favorite animal (no surprise there) and is a symbol of good luck (if the trunk is facing upward), I thought that it would be perfect! It was pure luck that I stumbled into a store at my local mall and noticed little elephant statues, for I was looking for them everywhere! Well after that, the day was as normal as it could be and at the end of the day I was surprised with a lovely goodie bag!!

Ugh. Today just reminded of the fact that I am moving back to school on Tuesday to start training as an RA (Resident Assistant). I want the school year to start, but at the same time I don't because I'm going to be in overdrive this fall; I've got so much going on. In between interning at Seventeen Magazine (Woops. I forgot to tell you all that this fall I'll be interning at Seventeen Magazine in the Fashion Closet! AH!) and school work and RA'n, I hope I don't... no, I know I won't burn out (trying to stay positive here).

More about how I got my internship at Seventeen Magazine; I stalked the Fashion Closet Facebook Group. I mean literally. I checked it every day (sometimes multiple times in one day) and when I saw they were accepting apps for the fall, I pounced on the opportunity! After my interview, I was kind of scared I didn't get it. I actually wore this outfit, but with a black jacket over it. I thought the smart idea would be to keep the outfit simple and "normal." No sense in going to an interview in an experimental outfit and end up looking like a buffoon, right? My interview was normal, but I'm usually good at reading interviewers and I know when I did well or not. However, the fab ladies were unreadable, so I was really scared and kept complaining to my mom for a whole week about how I hope I get it while she repeatedly reassured me, "you got it! Stop worrying," but I just brushed her off like another supposed-to-support mother. I start in September. The End.

Summer's coming to an end real soon. How does everyone feel about this?

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Secretista